Lions and Tigers and Moms...Oh My!

Natalie gets ready for her big adventure!

Last week I took Natalie to the zoo. She has been fascinated by four legged creatures ever since she was old enough to observe them, laughing hysterically when she first noticed our pets Fenway and Bruce and screaming with glee when she first met our horse, TJ. The zoo felt like a natural first big outing together.

She loved it! For several hours last Friday the zoo gained a new animal, "The Screeching Baby." Natalie squealed and squawked while gesticulating madly in her front-carrier and in my arms. She was most enamored with the prairie dogs, the pronghorns, and the water fountain. Each of which she would have been happy to observe for hours on end.

The trip was fantastic. Some, however, are calling for a permanent revocation of my "man-card". You see, I didn't travel to the zoo on my own...I went with a...um...Mom's group.

Before I lose possession of that valuable card, which entitles me to limitless belches, fart jokes, greasy food, and crotch grabs, I'd like to make a few points.

1. I'm used to being surrounded by women.

I'd like to claim that my female surroundings in college were due to my rugged good looks, my way with words, or my musical prowess on what friends called my "weepy-guitar" (Seriously just ask Sara about that romantic classic "Ear-wax Girl" or our friend Sara Hesse about the heart-felt ballad I wrote when she went abroad to Ghana titled, "You've Gone to Ghana...Rhea") but the truth is a little less flattering. I majored in Sociology, which was a subject dominated by women. I was the only man in four years at Hamilton elected to the Volunteer committee's Executive Board. I started to pledge Beta-Data-Mana before I realized it was a sorority...OK I made that one up but you get the point. In college I spent a lot of time around women.

I graduated and worked at a non-profit as one of the few men in the office. I obtained my MFA in creative writing, where women easily outnumbered men. I worked as the only man at a day-care center while getting my degree. I coached girl's basketball and softball and lived in a girl's dorm at St. Mark's school in Massachusetts.

So, while I'd gladly have joined a father's group, where stay-at-home dad's get together, plop their little-ones on a blanket, drink, play video games, and eat pizza...they don't exist. At least in Oxford, CT. And, I suppose, might not be as productive for the kids...

Women still dominate the field of stay-at-home parents and once again I'm in a familiar position. My "colleagues" are everyone else's better-halves.

2. I needed to get out more.

Sara had been politely suggesting for months that I join a stay-at-home parenting group. In deference to my maleness, she never said 'mom's group.' But she finally started sending me links to local groups, with names like "Mothers of Central CT", "Mommy and Me", and "The League of Super-Amazing Moms".

She knew what I knew, that living in the middle of no-where CT, with friends and family spread across the country, I needed to find ways to get out and do stuff. And, perhaps more importantly, Natalie needed to get out and do stuff with other kids. There are only so many times she can stomach me reading Dr. Seuss's ABCs, which by the way I've memorized and plan on performing as a one man show...

I e-mailed one of the groups to find out more. I discovered they were willing to accept someone with only one X chromosome and were taking a trip to the Zoo. I signed up.

Natalie not only had a blast screaming DADADADA at the goat kids, she also loved watching the human kids. It's ultimately healthy and productive for her to see faces other than mommy's and daddy's on a regular basis. I enjoyed having people my own age to talk and relate with even if none of them belched, made a fart joke, or ate pizza...

3. So What?

It's not 1950. I don't come home, have a drink, smoke a cigar, and retire to my office. I'm a father who's spending time at home with his daughter because because Sara and I want someone we trust with our little-girl in her early years. Plus Sara is ten times smarter than me and can make more money.

I don't mind doing "un-manly" things like laundry, cooking, and talking to my daughter in an odd high-pitched voice that makes me sound like Bobby from Bobby's world.

And I don't mind joining a mom's group. In fact I'm glad I did it. Natalie and I had fun at the zoo and I look forward to future outings with the group.

My love of sports, flatulent themed jokes, and greasy food help make me a man.

But in the end I think I earn my "man-card" because I'm not afraid to do whatever it takes to give my daughter the best. Even if it means dish-pan hands, bake-sales, and fewer crotch grabs.

Natalie's worth it.